ANJUM IBRAHIM

Sanitizers and our MPs

“I would like to know if sanitizers are provided to our parliamentarians at the tax payers’ expense or they buy it from their own money.”

“It’s a very small expense and…”

“Just answer the question.”

“Even if the parliamentarian brought his own sanitizer he gets paid a daily allowance at the taxpayers’ expense for attending the parliamentary session and I propose that no one gets paid for the three days of mayhem…”

“Not happening as the deciders are the parliamentarians.”

“Can’t the Speaker decide this?”

“The Prime Minister has no time today I hear – he is very busy…”

“I didn’t say the Prime Minister, I said the Speaker.”

“The Speaker has to clear it with the Prime Minister, and the Prime Minister likes to balance out – three PML-N and three PTI parliamentarians barred for using abusive language and hurling books…”

“So let him consult.”

“PTI and coalition are in government so they have more parliamentarians and the fifty-fifty principle cannot apply.”

“Oh dear, so what can the Speaker do?”

“He can have all the sanitizers placed on desks of parliamentarians removed.”

“And if they bring their own sanitizer bottles?”

“Then as the most philosophical minded of them all…”

“Don’t be sarcastic. I reckon though for The Khan’s philosophical mantra of Madinah ki Riayast hasn’t caught on because of the dratted inflation and food inflation at that it will eventually catch on and…”

“I wasn’t referring to The Khan, I was referring to the much more vocal philosopher Sheikh Rashid…”

“You after his job?”

“No, anyway the most philosophical minded of The Khan team member would say to you tain tain fish…and don’t ask me to translate tain tain and fish here has nothing to do with fish in water…”

“I give up.”